I always did something I was a little not ready to do.

Back when I started my career, I was fearful of every new opportunity.  The unknown can be scary and I didn't have the confidence in myself that I would succeed.  Thankfully I had a manager back then who reminded me that I had what it takes and gratefully I listened and pushed myself even when I was scared.  I can think of very specific milestones where I was terrified to fail and I can also think of a turning point where I knew through experience that even if I failed, I needed to give myself a chance to try anyway.

I never intended to wind up in business.  I wanted to be a psychologist when I started college and was certain I'd never step foot in a traditional organization.  The reality was I needed a job to support myself and wound up as a temp at Jack in the Box back in 2002.  The day I started at Jack was the same day my then-best friend left for college (and I was watching her younger siblings so her mom could join her in dropping her off at school), it was the first day of school for me, and I was barely 20 and had no clue what I was doing.  All on the same day I spent a full 8 hours at work, got kids to and from sports activities, made dinner, went to night school, and then got kids to sleep and ready for school the next day.  To say I was overwhelmed was an understatement, but it was the first of many moments that come to mind when I think of taking a step I wasn't entirely ready for.

Before too long I decided being a psychologist wasn't the right course for me, but I loved being in the office.  I put school on pause and took a role as a Payroll Representative at Jack.  On my first day in that role I volunteered for a project, which seemed to impress my manager, but just felt natural to me.  I love to learn and wanted to be included in the project rather than learning it down the road from others.  I was scared, sure, but pushed forward anyway.  That moment led to several other moments that defined who I am and how I choose to operate in my career:

• My first presentation to the team:  Seven of us were selected to give a presentation on a component of our system, Lawson.  I was so petrified that my hands became clammy, I wasn't sure I knew my own name, and my face turned bright red.  Even if you're terrified, the only way out is through.
• Asking for a promotion: I had been a Payroll Representative I for a bit when a Representative II position opened up.  I asked my boss if she thought I'd qualify and by the end of the day I had accepted the position.  If you don't ask, the answer is always no.
• Learning to process payroll: My manager sat me down before I started learning the actual payroll processing and told me that on my fifth payroll she'd be sitting with me and quizzing me.  HOLY CRAP.  This haunted me for about 10 weeks and I prepared with note cards, co-workers quizzing me, and generally simmering in my own anxiety.  There were things I didn't know when it came down to it, but it was the best learning session I had up to that point with my manager.  She knew I'd come prepared, but she also knew there was more she could show me.  Sometimes leaders push you because they know you're capable of more.
• Becoming a trainer:  There was a small group of trainers in the department and with one going out on leave, I was selected to train the next addition to the group.  She was awful and I failed hard.  When the next new addition came up, I asked to train her.  It was one of the best relationships of my career to date and taught me so much about how to adapt my training to meet people where they are and what they need.
• Diving into Corporate payroll: Our department was separated into Production (restaurant) payroll and Corporate payroll.  I was the first to learn both, which was scary but showed that the faith in me was there.  This was my first "big mistake" moment in processing payroll, too.  There were certain jobs that needed to be run depending which group was being processed (Production vs Corporate).  I was processing Corporate and ran a Production job, which in essence went out and assigned arrears to EVERY.SINGLE.EMPLOYEE.  It was one of those moments where I had tunnel vision and was certain my life was over.  Thankfully we figured out how to fix it and a crisis was averted, but I learned that mistakes happen and it doesn't have to be the end.
• Qdoba: Jack in the Box owned Qdoba from 2003-2018 and around the end of 2009 it was decided we'd be taking on their payroll processing.  My manager pulled three of us together, told us we were going to be in charge of the project, and then informed me I needed to teach the Qdoba team how to use Lawson.  Say WHAT?!  I did it though.  I made it happen and in the process learned I can do anything I set my mind to.
• Leaving Payroll: Eventually I became a Payroll Accountant and knew going in that I wasn't entirely interested in the numbers.  I love process, but numbers leave much to be desired.  I often joked that if $.28 was missing from an account I didn't care, but I could build a process so it didn't get lost again.  After a couple years in the role I decided it was time to switch it up.  I had spent my entire career in the Payroll department and leaving was a huge leap of faith.  I landed in HRIS where I was able to take my knowledge and expand it in several directions.  I learned Compensation, Benefits, Retirement, HR General, IT, and on and on.  It was a huge blessing to stretch my mind and skill set.
• Leaving Jack in the Box: I talked about this recently, but leaving Jack in the Box as a whole was earth-shattering for me.  It was basically all I'd ever known and I wasn't sure how I'd do in another organization.  It afforded me the opportunity, however, to move from the little engine that could to the person who already is.  I am established in my career, I know what I'm doing, I know I can learn as I go, and I know what I bring to the table.  Success!
• Learning Workday:  If I need to learn something, I don't dilly dally.  I set my sights on the prize (learning) and make it happen.  I made it through Novice, Journeyman, and Intermediate training in 10 months and have launched into Advanced level.  I can see my progress when I work with clients and can advise them in ways I couldn't have previously.  I even had a client tell a high level executive this week that they really appreciated my help last cycle.  What a compliment!  I love Workday, my team, and my progress.  I thrive in helping others and get to do that daily.

The purpose of mentioning this is not to toot my own horn.  It's to point out that when I've pushed myself beyond my comfort zone, I've grown.  I've learned.  I've stumbled and picked myself back up.  It's not for everyone and that's completely fine, but it works well for me.  I love to learn and grow and achieve.  I love to help others learn and grow and achieve.  I love to see how a project that feels hopeless turns into a success.  Had I not been through all of the things I mentioned above, I have no idea where I'd be, but I sure am glad I'm where I am.  I have failed horribly at certain things, but it's shown me what my strengths are.  I've agreed to things I later regretted, but it taught me to be sure I'm on board before I commit.  I've put life aside to focus on work, but it taught me that balance is key.  I've given up personal time to better myself professionally, which I can't apologize for, because i was where I needed to be at the time.  It cost me relationships and created anxiety, but it showed me who will stick by me through everything.

When I look back on all of it, I am really proud.  I had my breakthroughs because I pushed forward.  I am who I am because I took leaps of faith not knowing how it'd turn out.  I truly believe success begins at the end of your comfort zone.  It has been in my most uncomfortable times that I've learned the most.